Wednesday, May 2, 2007

A Bar Mitzvah at Sea





A Bar Mitzvah at Sea

Day 1.

Day one came much too early. The limo came to pack us up at dawn. We, of course were not ready. I decided that I was not going to wait for the ship to start taking pills for sea-sickness. After all I’m not a great flyer.
We got to the airport with a bit of extra time. I knew Heidi and Jimmy were on the same flight. We waited and they were still not there. I always assume I’m wrong, so I started asking Ilene “ are you sure we are on the right flight?”
Well with a few min. to spare, here comes Jim out of breath with Heidi and seven 13 yrs. Old boys, three 14½ yrs old girls and Mallory.
The plane ride was uneventful. We watched part of Scooby-doo on the laptop (mistake to lug that thing, I’m sure I’ll do at again).
We took a taxi to the ship. We were not able to get into our rooms yet, so we had the first of many buffets. They hand you a plate that is the size of a platter. No one goes hungry on a cruse. I can eat a lot, but seeing people over eat reduces my appetite.

It was time to see our room. I had a very low expectation, and the “Stateroom” was a disappointment. It was small, dark and genuinely depressing. I t would have to be twice as large to be used in the STATEROOM scene from the Marx Brothers.










Ilene was upset, Lane thought it looked nice. Ilene want to talk to someone about Upgrading the room. I went to the pool. I was sitting there feeling a bit sorry for my self when a young girl went by in a wheel chair. She had no arms or no legs. That put things in perspective real quick. I’m sitting on a lounge chair on a cruse ship on a beautiful day. I’m with my wife and child, my parents, Heidi, Jimmy the kids, Jori and Bonny, All are well. If you can’t be happy on a day like that, you do not deserve to be happy. How many times in the future will I look back and say, “if I could only return to that day, that time in my life. How many people would give a year of their life to relive one day when there family were well and together. I learned two things.
1. You get what you pay for.
2. It’s your attitude that determines how much fun you have.
By the way Ilene did upgrade the room.

We went exploring around the ship while suitcases were being moved.
We went to dinner and found that the tables were not all together. The whole planning of this trip had been a disaster. Jerry called every day for 6 weeks to Cruses Only, and never got much help. Jim did not have much better luck.
Jerry went to talk to someone and got them to Do officially what we started to do our-selves, which was to make two tables work, one for the Kids, one for the adults. It was wonderful.

The amount of food was insane. We would order more than we could eat, and we eat more than we should.


Jim kept the wine flowing. Lane was in heaven because he had mallory and the “BIG BOYS” were paying attention to him.
Went to the show on the boat. The show had a comedian and Matt Baker our cruise director.
The “Boys” found some groupies. The “Girls” also found some friends of their own. Lane checked out the Kids center.

Day 2
Getting 21 people to move as a group is like trying to herd cats.
I walked with Jori and Heidi for a while, then just with Jori since Heidi wanted to go at her pace which was faster than Jori, and she ran with Jerry who was too fast for Judy who was upset that she could not go with Heidi. Jimmy was trying to keep 10 teenagers safe and out of trouble. There was a lot of time spent looking for one another. Jerry was franticly trying to “Do the right thing”.
Breakfast buffet was a lot of walking around with “Platters of food” in search of a table and people to sit with. I never eat breakfast But boy can I.
We all left the boat to go to KEY WEST.
We had a startling array of communication equipment. Never has so much technology accomplished so little. The cell phones rarely got answered, and the walkie-talkies were so garbled they sounded like we were on different planets. The girls went shopping, Jimmy took the boys, Judy Lane and Ilene went shopping, and Jerry and I rented bikes. Compared to the bike I just bought, this is almost a different machine entirely. But it was hot and it was fun to speed along. It was great to spend the time (away from work) with Jerry.
I loved the architecture. Victorian, but with the southern island look. This is where Ethan Allen furniture should go to shoot its Hemmingway inspired collection. Saw Hemmingway’s house, and the house that is the furthest most point south in the USA.
Found All of our party at one time or another.
WE switched and let Ilene and Judy ride the bikes back. After all it was HOT. I went with Ilene looking for stuff for her teeth, no luck.
More buffet, more pool, more drinks in commemorative glasses.
Dress for dinner. Jori has her 11th matching outfit. If I was a woman, I would be worse. Took pictures
I guess the “Groupies” were really getting obsessed with Teddy and his friends. The more Teddy pulled away, the more they wanted him. Boy that was a technique I never learned when I was a teenager ( I had not learned that in my 20s either).
Lane held his own in a few conversations with Teddy’s friends. They really were sweet to him. Lane and Mallory went to the kids center we went to the show. It was a dance show about rock in the movies. The performers were good. They were not Broadway good but they were suburban playhouse good. All in all it was worthwhile. We got Lane and Mallory, walked around and went back to our room.
Day 3
A little more early morning confusion, a lot of phone calls, a little searching for this one or that one. More platters of food.
Ilene Lane and myself were on our own. We had made plans to see the Mayan ruins

El Castillo
The most outstanding building of Tulum is the Castle, El Castillo, perched on Tulum's highest cliff. This temple-topped pyramid also served as a watchtower and a lighthouse. Like many important structures in the Mayan world, the current building is the result of different stages of additional construction. It began as a palace-like base, the staircase added at a later date and eventually it was crowned by the temple on top. The doorway to the temple has columns in the shape of rattlesnakes, with the tails supporting the roof and their heads adjoining the floor. Due to the rapidly increasing number of tourists to Tulum, El Castillo is now roped-off, and not possible to climb. However, on the other side of the little beach, there's another building on a smaller cliff, which you are allowed to climb. From there you will have a fantastic view over El Castillo and the site in general.
Facts
Tulum is located about 50 minutes south of Playa del Carmen. The ruins are north of the town. The highway bends away from the coast here, so the town is actually a few minutes drive from the sea. Tulum's Zona Hotelera, or hotel zone, is reached by turning left at the traffic light before town. Heading to the right are many cenotes, and eventually the ruins of Cobá. The hotel zone leans towards the beach cabaña style, offering everything from simple accommodation options to newer, more costly 'designer' style palapas. The town of Tulum has several restaurants and convenience stores for supplies.
We took a ferry to a bus in order to get there, but it was well worth while. Finally the reason I lugged the Bronica paid off. I can work for many days on the photos. All around the world there is junk. Tee-shirt shops, Junk jewelry, Franchised restaurants, the Gap, etc. but there are still some places worth traveling to- this was one of them.
Like Stonehenge, this place really has an “Other world” feel.
After the tour, we went back to Carmen d playa. I am sorry that we could not spend time there. When we got to Cancun I was even more sorry we could not spend more time in Carmen d Playa. Cancun was a dump, one junk store after another. I know that there was some silver worth buying, but it was an unattractive, poor town filled with people trying to drag you into their store. Ilene got some earrings which were very pretty I’m not sure if they were a bargain. Went back to the ship. Had a late buffet.
Jim had gone with Jerry and the kids to this beach park Jerry found. Jim got Scuba equipment for the boys. Jerry watched the girls a bit, and went snorkeling. It sounded like the boys had fun.
The woman were shopping. They all came back with silver.
I hung out at the pool, Lifted weights with Jim for a few min.
Jim did the Belly Flop contest- he did not win. Had some drinks by the pool, more commemorative glasses.
Got ready for dinner.
Again the wine was flowing. Heidi was getting a little upset with the groupie thing. “ Don’t these girls have parents.” I guess they won the trip, and then one of them won BINGO. I think they made a profit. We spent a little time in the Casino. I was with Jim when he was at the craps table. He was tossing, and yelling, winning and loosing. It was as if he was speaking another world. I asked him how he knew what he was doing. He said “ When you were young and Jerry was taking you out to museums, my father was teaching me to play craps,” We had a table in the basement”.
Lane and Mallory went to kids center. We went to the show first. We saw a Juggler, and a ventriloquist. Very good.
Day 4
This was an at sea day. We woke up, put the towels out to reserve chairs. More confusion, with trying to get groups of people together for Breakfast, work out morning walks. Teddy and his group and Kimmie and her group were on there own cruse. Lane and Malory get along real well and I think they both had fun. At some point the fact that one is a boy and one is a girl will be a factor in them not being so close; but for now its fantastic.
This was a day of hanging out on the boat. Jerry bought bingo tickets for everyone. Ilene was close but no cigar. Lane did actually get up and sing Painted Black for the kids talent show. I am always surprised that he has the guts to do that. I certainly do not push him. I would be terrified. It was really cool that the big kids came to see him. He expected the adults to be there, but teenagers’ making a special trip to see him was a big deal.



There was a lot of “cruse events”. Sexy legs contest, Fake horse races that sort of thing. Can someone please explain to me why Black Sabbath’s Iron Man and Bach’s toccata and fugue in G minor sound the same when played on a steel drum? Every song sounds the same when played by one of those imitation “Island bands”. We logged in dozens of hours of that sound alike music. It is decoration like the little umbrellas in the drinks. The music gives you permission to over drink.

Dinner was not with-out conflict.
Our table of “kids” were situated right next to a table of “Adults” that seemed not to take delight in the laughter of children. This was a cruse that was in large part populated by families. The kids were not quite, but were overwhelmedly well behaved. They also were very brief in the duration spent dinning. How different people deal with conflict tells a lot about who they are. My immediate reaction was to say “Sorry” and send over a bottle of wine (even though I think they were wrong). Jim sort of ignored them while taking some delight in the other table’s unjustified displeasure. Judy went up to make nice with a tinge of sarcasm in her sweetness, when the woman screamed at her for touching her, Heidi wanted to rip the lady’s throat out. In many ways I thing Heidi’s response is healthier than mine.


Last day
WE got up, could not find anyone. Paid the bill which was much higher than I expected, but was accurate. We left the boat, and maid the assumption that since we could not find anyone or their luggage that they must have already gone- I was wrong.
We were in the cab when we got the call from Jimmy, so we changed direction and went to the beach. I figured we could get a hotel to hold our stuff while we went to the beach. I remembered the Yankee Clipper and we showed up there.
Gave the guy a hefty tip to hold our stuff. He was quite pleased, He was even happier when Jim showed up with more luggage and an other tip. In fact he was pleased enough to offer us the run of the pool and beach- an offer we took him up on. Jim bought lunch for twenty people :so I do not feel bad for the hotel. In fact the manager looking at that days books probably was surprised to see such large sales at
the pool bar for a day with few registered guests.
Ellio joined us at the pool and the beach. It really turned out to be a nice day.
It was the perfect thing to do for the few hours we had to spend.

Our cab driver ( I say “Our cab driver”) because he was the one that took us to the hotel, and made advanced arrangements to pick us back up again. We got to the airport. Went to the terminal and waited and waited. I saw Jessie Jackson there. He was also waiting.
We said hello. Ilene asked him what he was doing to get rid of Bush” He said “I TRYING”. Everyone else got to the airport for their flight one hour later than ours but due to weather. ( Our beautiful day turned dark and rainy real quick. We were stuck on the plain for over an hour and a half. That was bad, it would have been much better to be in the terminal.

Well another vacation is complete. All in all I glad I went.

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